Script - You Will Be Happy I Died

Begin scene:
Setting: The gym hall.
The headmistress, Principal and a small, frail looking girl stand at the front of the gym hall. The senior class is huddled on the floor, looking at them.
The headmistress motions for the girl to step up to the microphone and begin. The girl steps up and looks out in the crowd with an expressionless face.

Girl: "Hi..."

The room falls silent and all eyes fall upon her.

Girl: " I am supposed to stand here and say something...Anything to justify Als' life but I can not. There are no words, no emotions that I can find that could do her death any justice. I can not stand here and say I am upset, hurt, shattered or broken because those words are far too minute to represent how I truly feel."

The girl pauses and a wave of sadness washes over her weakened face. The Headmistress steps up, puts her hand on the girls shoulder with an encouraging expression.

Girl: "Everyone at this college always saw Al and I competing, arguing and trying to out do one another. So many of you found it hard to believe how we were such close friends.
Well...We weren't friends.
We were sisters.
And all the competition between us?
It was to make each other better.
That was our friendship.
That was my Al.
Al always pushed me to be better in every aspect of my life but she was never all that successful. She always joked it was because I was a Taurus. "You're as stubborn as they come." She had always said.
I miss her jokes.

Normally, I would never stand before all of you and pour my heart out. The only reason I stand here now is because yesterday, Al told me to.
Al says hi."

Everyone in the room lifts their heads to look at the girl with confused expressions. The girl smiles.

Girl: "Yesterday, I received a letter from Al. She had a few letters ordered to be delivered to me in case...She died."

Headmistress: "Read us the letter...Please."

The girl takes out a folded note from her pocket.

Girl: "This is Als' letter...
You stupid bull!
You never did listen to me when I was alive. Well, now it is my dying wish that you do everything all my letters tell you to. Every now and then you will receive a letter with a mission. Muah.
I die. You become my puppet.
Your first task; Stand before our senior class and make a speech about how awesome and amazing I was.
Tell them I say hi."

The girl pauses as the students smile in pain. Then she continues reading the letter.

Girl: "My love, I miss you.
These letters will make your life perfect because I know you will do everything. By the time you are through with all the letters, you will be happy I died."

The girl chokes and runs out of the gym hall.

End scene.

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The hopes of a pessimist

     I was born a pessimist. I was never supposed to put my faith, my trust and love into anything. I always knew love was a figment of a persons imagination, certainly not something to hold on to. I always knew falling would lead to heartache and despair, so I never let myself stumble and fall. Except for once. I let myself believe in the beauty of the ordinary. After all, anyone can love a rose but not many fall for the leaf. I fell for the leaf. I put everything on the line for the leaf and somewhere along the way, I made myself believe that my delusion was a reality and that the leaf was a rose. I forgot all the things I told myself, all the things I knew since the moment of my existence. I made myself believe that love could live forever. I made myself believe that the fire would never stop burning. I forgot that everything including roses and leaves die and love is no exception. There are no exceptions for a pessimist. There are no exceptions.
     It took me a while to realize the error of my beliefs. It took me a while to understand that it doesn't matter if you fall for the leaf or the rose. If you put your faith in something, if you make something seem beautiful, you're going to get hurt. I chased the lies I found myself surrounded in, believing they would keep me in the good graces of that which I found beautiful.
     I wish I could say I learned my lesson. I wish I could say I would never go back and look at the poisonous beauty of the world but I would be oh so wrong. I would be a liar if I said I didn't stop to savour the pleasures of the world every now and then. I do not dare go near love that I admit but I do allow my heart to be released from its cage occasionally allowing it to be submerged in hope. A hope that keeps my heart willing to stay hidden in a deep, dark hole that I was able to dig.
     You may think me to be ridiculous but I've built up walls and the only way to keep myself strong is to keep hope.
     Hope isn't something you find around the corner though. No, hope is something that finds you. Something that makes your heart attack the walls that imprison it and scream to spend a few glorious moments with it.
I do not find that hope in the love of a person any more  I often find it in the feeling of looking at photographs which are ordinary but carry the feeling I desire. Not many photographs do that, no. Anyone can write a few words, capture a few pictures but it takes something more to be a writer or a photographer. I find hope in art that drips in passion. There aren't many photographs out there that are glazed in the emotions of its passionate captors but when I do find something as so, I know in a heart beat. I know there is hope. Its a rare feeling, especially for a pessimist like me but its the most rewarding feeling I can find when everything seems destroyed and when I feel alone. 

This photograph taken from Mubah Rafi photography may not seem like much but it speaks to the heart. In times when close companions don't seem to speak the same language as this broken and scarred heart, photographs like this do.
Maybe I'm just the Girl With Issues rambling on about a silly broken heart or maybe the passion photographers like this are capable of hiding in their photographs is so much more beautiful than the fake promises the ordinary make.
Maybe. Just maybe.

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